About a week ago, I saw one of the cheesiest, most bizarre movies I've ever seen, Xtro. I have no idea how I came across this title. Nor do I know how it became to exist in my Netflix queue. But, I'm quite glad that I had the pleasure of viewing this treasure.

Xtro is ultimately about a boy. Little Tony is scarred at a young age by the disappearance of his father, Sam. They were out for an ordinary game of catch, when POOF! Aliens appear from beyond the mountains and abduct Sam. Alone, Tony grieves for his loss. Returning home, no one believes him. Those who don't know the truth believe that Sam had run away from his responsibilities as a father. The aliens couldn't have picked a worse time to intervene as things hadn't really been going well at home.

3 years later, things have actually turned out better for everyone except Tony. His mother is now with a cool hunky photographer. They live in downtown London where all the magic happens. Tony has a super hot babysitter who gets naked several times throughout the film.

Unfortunately, Tony has recurring nightmares of his father's abduction. He wakes throughout the night from his own screams and whimpers. Alas, his mother still does not believe him. "Quite whining and shut up about that ridiculous lie. He left us!" She would say as she burst into his room, afterward returning to her bed with her super-fly boyfriend.

Meanwhile, in the forests outside of London the aliens return! They appear above the trees and deposit an odd creature. An infantile organism that begins to adapt and move across the forest bed... it finds the smooth pavement of a nearby road, and then suddenly finds the bumper of an oncoming car. Shocked by ramming such a weird looking animal, the automobile stops and its occupants search for the wounded being. Of course, the alien finds them first.

Meanwhile, later, the alien finds itself upon a cabin in the woods with a lone female occupant. You may guess what might happen next. Bow-chicka-wow-wow... The alien impregnates the woman and runs off. Never to be seen in the film again. Startled by such an event, the young woman is dazed but then feels the fetus inside her.

The fetus rapidly grows and... here's a clip of what happens next as she gives birth... Xtro.mpg

It's Sam! Sam is back from outer space and ready to relive his life as Tony's father. Of course he doesn't actually remember being abducted.

As you might expect, drama occurs, then murder, then boobs, then it gets weird.


Ultimately, Sam's purpose for return was to retrieve Tony. But in order for Tony to adapt to space travel, he must under go a transformation process. Sam bestows the power to overcome adaption to space. As the power matures inside of Tony, he gains the power to materialize his hallucinations. But ultimately, he's taken over by the power's control.

Tony's first order of business is to create a friend. The friend that he's always wanted! A creepy clown midget will do. Next! Kill all my annoying neighbors with life sized versions of my toys. Kill my asshole step dad. Kill that asshole elderly woman, downstairs. Kill the hot naked babysitter for some reason. Actually, wait a minute. Don't kill her. Knock her out. Mutate her womb. And then collect the alien eggs she produces. Next! Tip over the refrigerator. Fill it with Guacamole. And use it as an incubator for more aliens. The perfect plan!

Meanwhile, Sam lures Mom back to the forest. Tony appears. And off they go to Never Never Land. Leaving the mom a wake of bodies and loneliness on earth.

The end.


I wish the Science Fiction movies of today had the bizarre spin of movies from the late 70s, early 80s. Has there been a horror movie in the past 5 or 10 years that has made you cringe and yell out, "Oh my god?!" I think Hostel has really been the only one I can think of. And maybe Event Horizon to an extent.

Why aren't movies this bold anymore?

Actually, now that I think of it... Asian torture films as of late have been quite brutal. Audition was one of the most difficult films to stomach (so to speak). That film is painful. Maybe I should watch more of those...


Besides the unbridled gore, wacky retro outfits and attitudes, Xtro has an amazing soundtrack. In fitting with the late 70s, early 80s, the score is entirely composed with a Moog Synthesizer. The Moog synth is vital in setting the tone of the movie consistent with the era in which is was produced. A very organic sound with an outright alien tynch. Atmospheric tone standing on the brink of technology.

Xtro is bizarre enough for me to love to begin with, but the beautiful crafted soundtrack keeps me locked in with the experience.

The end...?

The ending of the Xtro is left open. There are some alternate endings on the DVD, but ultimately the alien eggs hatch and you're left to figure out what happens next.

There are two sequels following Xtro, but have absolutely nothing to do with the original movie, nor each other. Both sequels feature military teams combating an alien menace. Xtro 2 (released in 1990) is an Alien ripoff, and Xtro 3 (released in 1995) is a Predator ripoff. Both films are god awful. Neither has nudity. Neither has grotesque horror.

Everything unique about Xtro 1 was completely generic in its sequels. The story. The characters. The setting. The action. The circumstances. The music.

Xtro 1 was pretty low budget, but they made up for it with imagery you'd never see anywhere else. Xtro 2 and 3 are wannabe copies of blockbuster films that try to bring the franchise back into reality. They are not bold, nor eye catching. They are sad imitations that I regret ever watching.

Anyways, definitely check out Xtro on Netflix, but forget about the sequels.

Also, I swiped that Clip from Badmovies.org's Review of Xtro. Check out that site for more pictures, quotes, and their own review. ^_^